How To Get Rich In 1 Fucking Min!
By: MR. JOSH GROSSGUTH
So I met this pretty cool
dude the other day! He was so cool and I was just so ecstatic! He taught me how
to get rich! I know out of
Nowhere along comes this dude tells me a thing or two and
boom there it was I was on my path to getting rich!
Now I know things like this don’t come along that often
and it is a rarity in itself...So I packed up my bags pencils
and pens and all left on location and went straight to
work in my office! Took me no less than 15min to figure it out and I was on my
way to being a super baller!
And what do you know 5 mins
In I had already made $1,000,000 dollars! Just like that this guy told me one
little secret which I may or may not express
in this piece of literature! If I feel the need I
will...Ok oKok Just give me a sec and I
will tell you all about it.
First let me say this guy looked ordinary, yes he had a
beard and was a bit pale but foremost there was this strange aurora about him.
He would move in a way like a weird bug or a snake of
some sort can’t quite put my finger on it but funny as it is while he
was telling me this secret he had his finger on his belly
button. Yes! His belly button
. i said "sir why do you have your finger on your
belly button!?" He looked at me with a snarl of a grim smile like he was
on PCP or something but yet he was calm and cool. He said
“that’s my get rich button!" So Here I was in the middle of a park
Leaning on a huge oak tree
and the guy says that’s my fucking get rich button. At this point I’m just flabbergasted
and just don’t know what to think.
He says" Try it"
" One push of this here little button and BOOM you’re
rich!" I said to the guy " You’re fucking crazy, There’s no way no
how in all of god’s creation that
if I press my belly button I’m going to get rich!"
So I thought, what the heck, let’s try this crazy’s guys thingy One because I
have nothing to loose
and two seems good enough.
So I press My belly button and Sure enough I felt a
little weird to tell you the truth. Anyhow As I pressed my belly
button I fe3lt this odd magical mystical force sensation
come over me like I was being zapped by gods power or something
straight outta of The X Files. I know this guy talked me
into to OK! So I felt this rush tingle from head to toe, heard
a noise over my left shoulder, looked over it and when I
looked back this guy was gone! Where he went I don’t know must have been no
more than 2 seconds
of a look.
So later that day When I was
walking home my belly button started to tingle again. I rubbed it looking down
at it, and when I looked back up there was the guy
shit you not he was about 15 ft in front of me with that
same grim smile. I couldn’t believe it and he said. "Make sure you wash
your belly button
tonight for the belly button gnomes will come!"
WHAT!? No way this guy did not! He DID! Gnomes! WhAT? Youre Crazy! There
are no gnomes! I least I never seen a gnome! I mean have
you! Maybe DAVID the Gnome. That’s about it. But surely David the gnome
wasn’t about to come get me was he? So I made it back
home and yea it was getting late so I decided to tuck and fuck it in a
little...
Rubbed one off to a nice
porno and decided to hit the hay! You know that half sleepy feeling like your
in and out of consciousness.
Well I was like that and maybe I was just tripping but as
I looked over my covers and into my closet there was the guy!
Kidding! Just Kidding! Its was not the gut although that
would have been a good spook! So I look iver my blankey and
theres David the gnome! OMG! Kidding Kidding again, Don’t
get mad its just david. LOL Ok say there was no david but What I did see
Was a nice shirt hanging there and that’s when it hit me!
I need to produce shirts of belly buttons. YES! That was it the The
Belly Button Shirt! All white t's with just a hole for
the belly button to breath with a nice little font above the hole
reading! Push Me! and Bellow it reading To be Rich! I
said That’s a million! Maybe not a Million Dollars, but hey a million
something.
So the very next day I got
right out of bed, ate a bunch of captain crunch of course, only the best cereal
on the planet! TRIPLE Berry!
I KNOW DELICIOUS!!! After my bowl and OJ I hit the Web
and find a production company in the specialy of making Custom
T shirts. I tell them my crazy idea about the belly
button shirts and sure enough the guy on the line laughs at me and says
"YES! WE can make that!" I was hysterically ecstatic!
i know Flopping around like a fish or something because it was at that point
I knew that guy in the park made me rich! I quickly went
into production and about 100,000 belly button t shirts! The turn around
time was nearly a week! And when they arrived at my
doorstep I went to work! I put each and every one on Ebay and Amazon, And
within 1 min almost half
my inventory was gone! Now I was selling these bad boys
at only $10 a pop! The other half sold roughly within the day mainly oversea
orders!
Yea I was doing
international orders also! But bottom line they Sold! I know they actually
fucking sold! The creepy old
fuck in the park gave me a hit idea and the world soaked
it up! If you ever see a belly button shirt, You know where it came from.
This is just a little encouragement to help anybody out
there that is reading this that miracles do happen if you r just use
ya noodle! This has been production courtesy of Mr. Josh
Grossguth! You're Welcome and may god be with you~
JOSH GROSSGUTH